<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>my twisted valentine by TheGirlOfIronAndBlood</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23231164">my twisted valentine</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGirlOfIronAndBlood/pseuds/TheGirlOfIronAndBlood'>TheGirlOfIronAndBlood</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Joseph Kavinsky is His Own Warning, M/M, characterization is dodgy but i try, false logic that you can have your feelings for your best friend fucked out of you, he has daddy issues but they dont get addressed, its SUPPOSED to be endgame pynch but i gave up, ronan lets kavinsky borderline abuse him to repent for being gay, this is a case of i watched too much junjou romantica as a 13 year old</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 12:29:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,164</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23231164</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGirlOfIronAndBlood/pseuds/TheGirlOfIronAndBlood</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>His memories start to flow back to him, slow and sticky like honey. He remembers racing K and losing. K offers him an ultimatum: Ronan either gives him the keys to the BMW for a night, or he gives him the keys to himself for a night. Most other days, the decision would've been simple. But most other days, Ronan hadn’t spent the day staring at Gansey’s hands as his skillful fingers put a tiny brick model of Aglionby back together. Hadn’t imagined putting them into his mouth, sucking on them as if he could reach the other boy’s soul just by pleasuring his fingers, imagined kissing the faint line of moles on the nape of his back. Other days, Ronan was less disgusted by his secret, less horrified at the person he had become in his father’s absence</p><p>“Give me something before you fuck me."</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Joseph Kavinsky/Ronan Lynch, one sided Richard Gansey III/Ronan Lynch</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>41</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>my twisted valentine</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>*okay so some people have commented that the start is quite explicit rape, but Ronan does give consent in the next paragraph if that helps, I'm really sorry if anyone did get triggered this is my first time writing something thats this... much sorry</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>[a/n: liberally used slurs, occasionally borders on non con, lots of internalized homophobia so read with caution: don’t trigger yourself to get off kids] </p><p>When Ronan comes to his senses, he’s lying face first on a mound of bed sheets and someone is thrusting into him. He tries to lift himself up, to push his assailant off, only to realise that his arms are tied together before falling back onto the bed. “Looks like sleeping beauty finally woke up.” Kavinsky sounds like he’s half a street away, even though Ronan can still feel his fingers clawing into his tattoo, K’s breath hot at his ear. “A pity, you’re a better hole unconcious, less fucking whiny”</p><p>His memories start to flow back to him, slow and sticky like honey. He remembers racing K and losing. K offers him an ultimatum: Ronan either gives him the keys to the BMW for a night, or he gives him the keys to himself for a night. Most other days, the decision would've been simple. But most other days, Ronan hadn’t spent the day staring at Gansey’s hands as his skillful fingers put a tiny brick model of Aglionby back together. Hadn’t imagined putting them into his mouth, sucking on them as if he could reach the other boy’s soul just by pleasuring his fingers, imagined kissing the faint line of moles on the nape of his back. Other days, Ronan was less disgusted by his secret, less horrified at the person he had become in his father’s absence. </p><p>“Give me something before you fuck me,” Ronan stretched his hand out at Kavinsky. The other boy looked surprised, surprised but not caught off guard. Maybe Kavinsky did know him better than himself after all. “Princess doesn’t want to spend his first time sober huh, you’re lucky I’m nothing like my father.” K pops something from his pocket into his mouth and leans in before Ronan can respond to a pair of lips forcing his open and a foreign tongue sliding a small pill down his throat. K kisses like a rabid dog, forcing himself into Ronan. The wet mouthed kiss slowly turns into a battle of dominance, their lips pushed hard against each other enough to bruise, but Ronan knows that it isn’t one he will win. He fights anyways, until K snakes a hand down his pants and makes Ronan feel so good that his mouth goes limp and he lets out an uncontrollable moan. </p><p>“Let’s not do this in public... Kavinsky please…” Ronan makes out before the world gets a little blurrier and he feels his blood rush downwards. “Relax princess, no one gives a shit that a fucking faggot wants it so bad that he’ll take it on the side of the road.” K sounds almost comforting as he continues to stroke Ronan. He remembers being too dizzy, too high on whatever fucked up concoction Kavinsky’s mind conjured up to protest as K pushes him over the hood of his Mitsubishi and shoves a finger inside of him. “Fuck, you really are a blushing virgin,” by that point Ronan feels like he’s floating on air, only to be grounded by the feeling of being torn open from behind as K shoves another two fingers in. It hurts so fucking much, and he is so out of it that he lets himself cry out and tears run down his face. “Shit, you’re a fucking crier.” The burning sensation disappears and is replaced by the cool edge of a beer can by his lips. “Drink it up princess, and don’t you dare tell anyone that I went soft on you. I just can’t stand you crying like a 7 year old on my cock” Ronan gulps up the beer like a dying man. Kavinsky is pouring it down his throat, not letting him pause to breath. He chokes and closes his mouth, letting the cold liquid flow down his shirt. “Drink it you fucking dumb slut,” Kavinsky drags him off the car and Ronan falls limply into his lap, letting K drain the rest of the beer into his mouth. When the can is empty, a calloused finger wipes the rest of the beer from his lips before a pair of lips is on his again. Ronan arches up into the kiss moaning wantonly, dignity and temper left behind with the pill and the can of laced beer he was just fed. He can feel K smile against his lips, “Oh you sweet little thing, I could make a fucktoy out of you yet.” The last thing he remembers is K bridal carrying him into the Mitsubishi. </p><p>He’s still numb from the fuckload of possibly tranquilizers that K put in the beer, but the pain is unbearable. It feels like he’s being torn apart, but with every thrust K hits something deep inside of him and his eyes roll so far back that he can see stars. He hears a pitiful whining before he realises that that he’s the one mewling like a fucking kitten as he cums into the sheets. Kavinsky continues to thrust into him, and he’s so oversensitive from his own climax that tears leak from his eyes again. “Please… please stop…” He pants out before K grunts and pulls out. Ronan can feel the cum dripping down his thighs and on his stomach, warm and dirty. </p><p>“If anyone had told me you looked so pretty like this, all tied up and used, I’d have drugged you and taken you a long time ago,” Ronan is about to protest when K shoves his fingers down his throat so deep that he gags. “Next time baby, I’m going to have your pretty little mouth around my cock like this, and I’m going to fuck you until your lips are swollen and all you can say is ‘more daddy more’. But next time.” </p><p>There will be no next time, Ronan thinks as K unties his arms with a surprising tenderness. There will be no next time, he thinks as K bites into his neck, too tired and too fucked out to do anything but pass out. </p><p>There will be no next time, Ronan thinks as he wakes up the next morning, his back and his ass so sore that he falls over as he gets off K’s bed. Kavinsky finds him on the floor, with nothing but a blanket covering his naked body. “Get up princess, before your keeper gets worried,” K starts before realising that Ronan is shaking in anger but he still doesn’t stand up. “I fucked you so hard you can’t even stand, and you moaned for it you fucking slut.” K’s voice sounds almost mocking, but there’s a layer of amusement, covered by a layer of lust, and even unbeknownst to Kavinsky himself, there is fear in his voice, that Ronan will never come back. Ronan braces himself to fight Kavinsky if he comes closer, but he doesn’t, only turning back to leave the room. </p><p>After Kavinsky leaves, Ronan fights to push himself up, ignoring the searing pain as he stumbles like a newborn foal to the side of the room where his clothes were tossed. He curses Kavinsky’s name as he winces while putting on his shirt, his arms still sore from whatever the fuck K tied him up with last night. He stumbles out of the room and into the courtyard, focusing too much on standing upright and not falling over to look around at the Kavinsky mansion. His BMW is there, and he doesn’t think about how it got there, can’t think actually, he pulls himself into the seat and drives back to Monmouth Manufacturing on muscle memory alone. </p><p>He didn't know what time it was by the time he got back, and he assumed that since Kavinsky had left, that school had started. But as he stumbled through the front door, it was already too late to run away again, to wait until Gansey left. </p><p>“Ronan are you okay?” Gansey looked shocked. “Don’t worry about it Mom,” he mumbled, subconsciously covering the side of his neck that K had bitten on the night before. “You look like you’ve been mauled by a bear- did you… did you get into a fight with Kavinsky again? He texted me last night to tell me you were with him.” Gansey sounded almost frantic. “Do I need to stay home? Do you need to see a doctor?”</p><p>“No it’s fine, go to school Gansey I’ll sort myself out, come back during lunch. Tell them I’m sick.” It wasn’t exactly a lie, he was sick, he was sick in the head, and he could barely stand to add to it. Ronan looked Gansey straight in the eye as he said it, knowing full well that his friend couldn’t refuse anything when he sounded so serious. He glanced at Gansey’s fingers again, and he didn’t feel anything. Oh. So it did work then. </p><p>Ronan dragged himself to his room, trying hard not to limp or wince as Gansey stared at his retreating figure. He fell onto his bed and fell asleep. He did not dream. </p><p>By the time he woke again, the clock on his bedside table showed that it was 11 am. “Shit,” Ronan swore as he got up, his legs feeling slightly less like pins as he climbed out of bed. He put on a stray aglionby blazer that was probably Gansey’s that was lying on the sofa, grabbed his bag before getting into the BMW and speeding towards school. </p><p>But as he walked across campus towards the Latin classroom, he realised that a lot of students were staring. More so than usual. He chalked it up to paranoia before turning a corner and walking straight into no one but Kavinsky himself. “Looking good there, Lynch,” he leaned down and Ronan could smell the tobacco on his breath. “I must say that I very much enjoy you looking like my slut even when you’re trailing around Dick Three like a dog.” Ronan was about to bite back with an insult when he heard Gansey calling him from behind. He turned, to see Gansey’s face go from his usual casual demeanour to a grave one. He quickly walked towards Ronan, dragging him by the arm towards the washroom. “Gansey I came to school,  what do you want?” “Ronan, I think you need to go look at yourself.”</p><p>Surely there wasn’t more than just a bruise on his shoulder that could easily be marked off as a wound from a short fight. </p><p>He was wrong.</p><p>“I’M GOING TO KILL THAT MOTHERFUCKING SON OF A BITCH” Ronan turned, furious and with a mind set on fucking up Kavinsky so hard that he wouldn’t even have a dick to shove into anyone ever again, before Gansey manhandled him back in front of the mirror. “You either explain yourself, or I’m telling Declan.” </p><p>Ronan properly took in his reflection. Kavinsky had done a real good job of his neck, a trail of unmistakable bites and scratches down to his collarbone. K had left a series of parallel scars on his chest that showed faintly through his thin undershirt, and there were bruises around his wrists and his lip was split. </p><p>Ronan took a deep breath. He looked at Gansey’s hands again. Nothing. Maybe he did need this, maybe this was good for him, if it kept his inappropriate feelings for the most important person in his life at bay. Every step he took today felt like a punishment for the unnaturalness of his desires, and it felt good in the most fucked up way possible. </p><p>“I had sex with Kavinsky.” He said it, plain and simple. Gansey made a face “Good god Ronan. Do you even like guys? Why would you choose Kavinsky out of everyone you could?” Gansey looked as if he was about to tear out his hair in frustration. “Ronan I just want you to be safe and happy, why do you keep feeling like you need to wreck yourself?” </p><p>Ronan thought about the pill, he thought about the way Kavinsky’s lips felt on his, like a promise and a curse, he thought about how it felt to lose all control, to just be forced to take and take and take. It was like alcohol, but it numbed the pain more and it stopped his head from wanting things that weren’t his to want. </p><p>“Shut up Gansey, I fucking liked it.” Ronan snapped back. “You aren’t my fucking father you don’t get to chose who I have sex with, so let’s go to class and leave me alone.” Gansey puffed up, as if he were about to say something, before letting out a sigh. “Does it make you happy?” He sounded so old in that moment, so tired of having to worry and pick up after Ronan’s bullshit. “No, but I’m going to do it anyways.” And that was the end of the discussion.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>a/n: the writing style is shitty as fuck so if you read this much thank you (this is endgame pynch though because for all my obsession on fucked up relationships i do love ronan a lot, and kavinsky is just fucking shit for him) i like ronan because he's strong willed, he doesn't take shit, but if he finds you worthy and submits to you, he will take any fucking shit you throw at him. i mean in canon, he lets kavinsky (and tbh everyone else at aglionby probably thinks this as well) say that he's gansey's dog and he doesn't care because you know what, he's submitted to gansey and he doesn't give a shit what you think. so i wrote that he will take your cock in his ass, he will let you tie him up and abuse him and do whatever you want and he will not fight back because he has submitted to you. he will walk around with hickies down his neck looking like he spent the weekend in bed being fucked and not have a single ounce of shame. he will punch anyone who teases him on it of course, but if its the truth, what is there for him to be mad at? he IS gansey's dog, in this he IS kavinsky's slut, so what.</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>